Finding peace in myself, peace in my community, finding trust in my relationships, is at the core of my belief that as a species, we are able to move towards a nonviolent approach to sharing this space we have here on this planet.
Finding peace is also something I have struggled with, sourced help with, found within
nonviolence practices, and enjoy continuing to navigate, share and model.
Whether it is watching the news and feeling that half the the world is fighting with the other half of the world, or sitting with the family at the table noticing the background tension you feel there, or, that aggressive and demeaning conversation you have with yourself, finding peace can sometimes be difficult.
Being able to sit quietly with myself, noticing what shows up, staying calm and connected, is the beginning of practicing a nonviolent relationship with myself. Using this capacity to stay quiet, centred and grounded, is also the core skill in managing my relationships with others.
Noticing the negative thoughts and conversations that go on in my own head, giving them space to be heard, time to consider what they might need and what is behind their discomfort, is the beginning of moving towards building a nonviolent relationship with myself, my friends, my community and the planet that feeds us all.
Without being able to find peace and a relaxed confidence within myself, it is very difficult to have meaningful relationships with others on a one to one, or to build healthy communities.
One of the questions I ask myself when noticing my own inner critical voice is; “what is the need that is not being met for this part of me?”
Whenever my body is asking me for attention, looking to share something big or small with me, how often do I give that attention, how often do I brush it aside, ignore and dismiss it?
Being able to understand, notice, and express what I need in any relationship is at the core of nonviolent communication.
Often it feels really difficult to do.
As a youngster many of us are encouraged to push past difficulty, to ignore, deny and repress our inner self doubts that show up.
Speaking and sharing those self doubts is often seen as;
Being needy.
Being oversensitive.
Being out of control, or weak.
And is nearly always difficult for others around us to know how to respond.
What I have noticed in the work I have done with individuals and groups, and with the work I continue to do for my own wellbeing with support from others, is that once we can identify, express and share what it is we need in order to feel at peace, the internal and external world becomes a much nicer place to live.
For more on nonviolence and how we can utilise it for building relationships and communities, feel free to get in touch, and also to share your own experiences around staying centred and grounded.
Thanks for sharing your attention here with me today, love and light, Mark.